“Can you ask employees if they are in a relationship?” The slippery slopes of working in HR are unending. And, whether it’s February 14 or any other day of the year, an office romance can be a nightmare for HR, especially when one of the parties is higher up on the chain of command.
A colleague called me the other day to get advice on whether or not she should ask two employees if they are dating. It was found that the employees had been spending an absurdly huge amount of work time together leading other employees to jump on the rumor mill and let everyone know in vicinity that love is in the air. What was she supposed to do? Where could she even start? And how do you even inquire two people in the office about their relationship status. More importantly, do employees have to tell HR if they’re dating?
If workplace fraternization is prohibited in the workplace, you may never really know what’s going on until the relationship ends and results into an ugly squabble.
The Legal and Ethical Implications of an office romance
Sexual harassment is a primary concern when you’re dealing with a potential romance brewing between two employees in the workplace.
“From an HR standpoint, workplace relationships have the potential to impact employee morale and productivity, retention, as well as the potential for harassment claims that may arise when an overzealous employee attempts to start a relationship with an uninterested party or when an initially consensual relationship comes to an end,” warns Beth Zoller, Legal Editor at XpertHR.
A lot of sexual harassment complaints result from a workplace romance gone sour. If workplace fraternization is prohibited in the workplace, you may never really know what’s going on until the relationship ends and results into an ugly squabble.
What you, as an HR manager, need to find out is your company’s policies surrounding office relationships. Does it have one? If so, what does it entail? If not, now is a good time to cover it in the employee manual.
The second, and most important, factor is ensuring there is no abuse of power. If the office romance is between a boss and a direct report, it’s best to ask if the two employees are dating.
There is no ‘best practice’ in this tricky scenario. A better approach would be to meet with them and ask one of the employees to move to another department. If it’s a manager-subordinate relationship, it’s quite tricky to move the manager. The size of the organization also makes a world of difference in taking such decisions. If it’s a larger company, it may be possible to move the employee internally. Within a smaller company, you may find it difficult to move the employee.
Why should HR get involved in an office romance?
HR’s role in handling or inquiring about workplace relationships is not about policing personal lives. It is to ensure a professional and fair work environment. When dealing with employees in a relationship, it’s best to proceed with caution to avoid any unnecessary invasion of privacy. The best way to deal with office romance is to focus on behavior rather than personal matters.
By staying proactive and transparent, you can effectively navigate the tricky waters of office romances while still fostering a respectful workplace.